My shi has invited me to post on this blog, I hope to make my submissions (of the literary kind) thought provoking if not down right challenging to both sides of TPE. To avoid any confusion my posts will be in this dirty gold colour, and labelled "Raden's Post"
Rules. Now there's a topic to wrestle with, as shi and I have done at times. For me there is one rule and that is sufficient, "Do as I say and learn from it". Frankly there is no need for more. We talk, I decide. Simple!
TPE is dependant on training and trust, and without trust, you can have thousands of silly rules to cover any challenging situation. That is not TPE in my mind.
shi has posted her "rules" on this site, they are a work in progress only, but unlike many slave rule lists I have seen that get longer and longer and longer..... this work in progress is more likely to get shorter! It has to or I will fail in the other aspect, training. Rules, to me are the standard. No arguing, no discussion a rule is to be obeyed. Fail and a period of punishment follows. Forget to wear your seat belt in your car and the cops will kick your ass. The same principle applies. Do it or suffer the consequences!
The idea is, anywhere in life, set up a rule, train and re-train until it becomes second nature then the rule is embedded into daily life. Period.
Do I need a rule that says that shi will be naked at home in my presence unless given permission to wear clothing? Today I do, but once shi knows the boundaries and respects them faultlessly its a lifestyle. I trust her to know what is required and to deliver it. shi trusts me not to make her cook food on the hob without an apron to protect her from spitting fat or a falling sharp knife. After all shi knows as well as I do, that while I may whip her to tears, it is still my duty to care for my prized possessions protecting them from accidental damage. Sometimes common sense is a rule.
So a rule is there to build trust and serve a lifestyle aspiration. Once its second nature, either the rule gets altered to reflect further development, or it become pointless as it is part of life.
I see far too many lists of "Rules" that could be reduced to a few salient points that work just as well as 50 pointless deviations from a minor theme.
Speaking personally, shi and I speak openly and frankly about our life.I know her limits, shi knows mine. Our limits will change as our trust and confidence in one another grows. After all, our lifestyle will be living life to its limits. Life changes and without open, honest, respectful communication having 500 rules is as pointless as one.