Saturday, November 19, 2011

Being hooded

I was given the task by my Master, that every night before  i turn in i am to visualize and embrace being hooded. He has purchased a leather hood with the capability of the eyes and mouth being bound as well. So that when i am in this hood i will see nothing, not be able to speak, and he will devise a way to muffle my hearing as well. A little background on this situation for me, when i went to spend some time with him a couple of years ago, he attempted to place the hood on me and i sort of freaked out. I am claustrophobic, having had a childhood incident that happened due to my own stupidity. So when the hood went over my head, and it was being fitted i flipped mildly. He was patient and did not push the hood on me at that time. But after an extended conversation last night, and some comments he made, when i am with him on day one i will be wearing that hood. For how long i do not know.Obviously having your senses taken away like that can be a frightening thing. But also as my Master has stated " I want you to embrace being hooded, blind and gagged in your mind and be ready to welcome it without fear, the last thing you will be thinking of each night is being hooded, gagged and blindfolded before the darkness of sleep and dreamland and develop the trust that I am close by."
"That hooding you will allow you to focus on what you are in real time, as you experience being a slave for real. We have spoken about ownership, mind, body and soul. The hood will take your mind and give it to me automatically.Isolation will play its part in the training and development. One more thing about the hood.. with distractions removed, you will savor whatever I do to your body with deeper  intensity, whether it is pain, gentleness or orgasm, so we will both receive benefits from it."
So on that note, last night i went to bed, visualizing what it would feel like to wear a hood. The sense of darkness enveloping, no sight no sound no speech. Feeling the press of leather against my skin, knowing that it would get warm over time. And depending on what was being done while hooded, could get down right damp.  I relish the idea of wearing the hood, Of having all my senses taken away, of not being able to see or hear what is being done, to not be allowed to speak unless he removes the mouth cover, it will allow my mind to sink into that slave mindset He and  i so crave. I can be wearing  the hood while caged and bound knowing that all this is at the whim of my Master. To discipline me for a wrong or  to give me the isolation to think of nothing but being his slave. He will take it slow with me and help to work through my fear and the claustrophobia i may feel. My Master stated "It is the one fear that I have encountered from you. I will remove it gently and replace it with total trust and acceptance." And i know from experience He will do it.
We have spoken of my first day with him as his slave, and as time has moved forward He has (as is his right) changed the plans for that first day. And as i have mentioned before i do not wish to know all the details. The anticipation of being in his arms is enough to keep me on the edge. To know that on that day in January i will be at his feet, for him to do with me as he wishes on that first day, is enough. My full immersed training begins on that day in real time and will continue for the rest of our days. For it is what we both want and need. And as the day approaches closer, i know in my heart that is where i am meant to be!
On a side note, i believe on one side i will accept this hood and become one with it, but since i really do not know for sure, i am sure through patience and training with my Master, acceptance will be the only way to go. Wearing this hood and becoming familiar with it is a part of my lot in life that i so willingly submit to.

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