Tuesday, November 15, 2011
i recently purchased an ebook titled Processing Pain Through Play, written by lunaKM. I am a masochist and thought it would be a benefit to read something written by another. I am glad i got it. Processing pain is different for all of us, and one of the reasons i purchased it was to see what other techniques i can learn. My Master and i want to build my tolerance for it as we progress forward in our relationship. Pain will be a part of my life as his slave. When i speak of pain, its not the kind to permanently damage me, it will be for the enjoyment of us both. There is a euphoria that happens when pain is mixed with pleasure, at least for me. And my Master wishes to explore that with me as time rolls on. I know that there are many of you out there that also enjoy pain in this context. My mindset is in slave mode, and gets more into it every day. As my travel date approaches, i sink into what it is i truly am. My relationship with my Master will be balanced with love, tenderness, domination and submission. I also know that there will be times pain will be wrought through punishment and not so much for the enjoyment for me, but as a slave that is expected. Through our many talks, we know what we desire from each other. There will be times when my body and mind will be pushed beyond what i think i can handle, but i know with his love and care for me, and his training, it is only the natural progression of what we are. We as Master/slave have alot to learn with one another, his training will be intense so that he can mold me into what he desires. But i go into this with open eyes and an open heart and know that this is where i was meant to be. Its what i have wanted and needed for most of my adult life, and until Him, never thought it possible or long lasting. But i know now that it is. He is my Master and i am his slave! And when we are together, him standing there, my kneeling naked and collared at his feet, i know i am home.